Paralinks: Worlds Wheelchair Culture
Send Mail 3/18/02 

My Reflections on the 'Vagina Monologues'
Grace of My Heart 

I was very excited when I heard and saw that the "Vagina Monologues" were coming to my small community.  After hearing about this performance for years, it was great for me to see that such a controversial (yet very important), professionally-endorsed show could be shown and supported by our community.  I knew I wanted to go, so it was great to get excited and dress up and see the crowds of women show up from all walks of life!

We were all (sister, our women friends, and my man-partner) quite impressed by the quality of the performance!  We were also deeply moved with mixed emotions throughout the performance.  Especially moving were all the funny and sexy ways in which the vagina was portrayed by the many different perspectives given in the monologues.  It was great to feel the connection of our humanness, as we laughed and reacted with the rest of the audience.

I personally felt that it was very empowering for myself and all other women who attended this performance to hear that the clitoris has eight thousand nerve endings, twice as many as the penis!  This fact, as well as the many other facts given in some of the monologues, was acted out in such a way as to give the listener a comfortable easiness and an acceptance of women's sexuality in general.  I absolutely loved the way the performers were able to create a friendly, open minded atmosphere, while raising fundamental awareness about women's sexual responses along with all the crazy, mixed up, funny, intense, sexy, and fearful emotions that go along with our understanding of the many dimensions of women's sexuality!!

I had first heard about Eve Ensler and the "Vagina Monologues" in the January 2001 issue of Oprah Magazine and hoped that she would be coming to perform in my area eventually.  The wait was worth it.  It was hysterical! 

I was familiar with most of the names used for the vagina when the performers ran through the list, but made note that "yoni" was not included, a sacred word used for the vagina in Tantric sexuality.  I was very impressed by how professional the performers were when each of them got into "character" for the various monologues. 

I especially flashed back to my own experience of "Bob" who was a lover of vaginas and how my particular friend Bobby enjoyed leaving my vaginal juices in his mustache to savor all day long.  After the performance, it was great fun to compare notes with my other women friends about each of our experiences with similar "Bob's" who have not only honored and cherished the vagina, but have been excitedly determined to give each of us in our own right as much pleasure and as many multiple orgasms as we could possibly endure!  I'm hoping that this particular monologue will give both men and women a new perspective (in the Western world), that women's vaginas, when given a good amount of gentle, caring, loving, relishing, passionate attention that they deserve, can be and the source of a tremendous amount of healthy, functional pleasure!  This subject is one aspect of Tantric sexuality that I have found has empowered women and brought an increase in the balance of power between the sexes as well as an increase in knowledge and study to the field of sexuality. 

The performance by the woman of all the different types of orgasms was, needless to say, very entertaining and funny, and somewhat embarrassing to watch and listen to in such a large crowd of strangers!  It really brought to my attention a curiosity about how many women are comfortable enough with themselves to really vocalize their pleasure when they have multiple orgasms.  I, more recently, have learned that I enjoy the sense of freedom and wildness when I do feel comfortable enough to express my pleasure without caring if roommates and/or neighbors will hear or know the source of the strange noises.  It seems to me that this subject is generally repressed in the sense that it's not talked about in social situations, not portrayed on TV shows, and not taught in high school sex classes.  I wonder, is it??

I had been aware of the sad facts about clitoral and female genital mutilations from my other class on human sexuality, but to hear it said on stage, for me, was a huge, important way for the general public to be educated about the tremendous repression of women's sexuality in other parts of the world.  Also, the fact that several hundred thousand rapes occur in the U.S. alone each year was shocking.  The obvious imbalance between male/female power must shift NOW! 

I am eternally grateful for Eve's courage and efforts in raising consciousness in the area of female sexuality and for all the women performers who support her mission! -Grace

Two previous columns by Grace of My Heart: 
Set Your Heart On Fire
Sexual pleasure for woman with SCI


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